Wednesday, September 28, 2005

30's blues

It's always the case. You look at something you don't have and wonder what it is, how it might be. You crave for it, work towards getting it if possible, and one day you attain it also. After a period of honeymoon, your mind begins to look for other unknown things. What you attained is now no longer a challenge, a mystery-- it's 'familiar'. Does it happen with every other thing? Mmmm.. yes, to a large extent. May be it's a natural law, i don't know. Maybe there are exceptions.

When i was a kid, the elders looked formidable. I wanted to grow up and be like them, do the things they did, take up responsiblilities, take decisions. When i was in college i wanted to get a job, become independent, build a career. When i was single, the family man looked as if he was perching on a high altar. It never occured to me that maybe they too were looking at a distant horizon and seeking what they didn't have.

Today i turned 30. But i don't feel like i'm 30. How does a 30 year old feel like? What's he supposed to feel like? I feel dumb. Ha ha.

They say, When a man reaches 60 it's like a completion of a cycle. A new life begins after that. If so, i've completed half of the cycle. Maybe i'll be a pa in an year or two. It looks unbelievable!


  1. hey libran..... happy birthday
    3 decades behind u and many more ahead....
    b/w yes ....the grass is greener on the other side always....

  2. Sugar! u have hit the nail on the head exactly! I often look to other people imagining their more fulfilling lives and aim to be where they are. Sometimes these people become my friends and surprise me when they confess to sharing the same feelings about me. Life is a confusing muddle!

    at 21 am i therefore passed thru a third of my cycle? scary!

  3. I am looking forward to 30, actually. A lot.

  4. Ash,
    Thanks for the wishes. Hope we all enjoy what we have, more than what we desire.

    b and p,
    Life is more of a mystery than a confusion, for me. Some times it's a shocking revealation also. Well, welcome to blogosphere.

    You don't have to say that. I'll tell you, you're cruising towards 30 and will gatecrash through it when you get there.
    Many of my friends enjoyed your recent entry which i'd mailed to them.

  5. Hi, Vishwanath! Here's wishing you a belated Happy Birthday! So, you live in Bangalore, eh. Well, I live real nearby too. Perhaps we might even meet sometime.

  6. WOH! spooked out big stylee, have just noticed ur from Bangalore, my friend has just come back from a year out there, she had a sandwich year doing design out there (she loved it soo much she didn't want to come back) small world :s

  7. Witnwise,
    Thank you so much.

    b and p,
    bangalore is really a great city-- pleasant weather, friendly people, horrible traffic, IT Boom, great future, pathetic infrastructure, et all. It's a cauldron. It has a personality like a real person. I agree with your friend.

  8. Late on the birthday wishes...but wishes none the less!!

    I was thinking the other day...ill be 30 in about 5.5 years...scary to think that was the age of my mom when i was mom's mom when she was born and my dad's mom...:-S

    Hope you had a good one and i love reading yur blog!