Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Couldn't resist this...

I wake up at 4.45, and collapse, hoping to stretch and wait until the alarm rings at 5. And drift and drift until I end up here...

She's there, in that classroom, with all of us. The same hesitation, uneasiness and blushing when she's around, and once everyone leaves, she walks up to me and sits by my side. And slowly, very slowly, we get into a conversation and she says that she always wanted to speak to me, wanted me to speak to her but...

And opens an old notebook in which she'd scribbled something ages ago and it reads 'I love him and will love only him, forever...'

And mumbles, 'I said that I'll wait for you and my parents warned me that one day I would come, but would have setup house elsewhere by that time so there's no point in waiting. But I held on and here you are!' She looks happy and pleased.

'I have something shocking to say,' I tell her, with a pounding heart. My wife and son are in my mind and I try my best to find words, words that don't hurt but will gently make one aware. 'You don't know how to speak,' I was told recently and I'd agreed. Words are just gutted out and not placed in tact. I'm a terrible conversationist.

'Don't,' she stops me with a smile. And suddenly her expression changes, as if she senses what I'm about to blurt out. The smile is still there
but I know that everything has changed inside, that something valuable has collapsed within her.

This is the first time I've seen her in my dreams and I feel this isn't just a dream. Maybe this is not like some of those vivid dreams which are astral experiences. But this confirms something, settles something, reconciles something that was in waiting. Something unfinished seems to have found its logical end. Like keeping down a burden that had been on ones heart from ages.

Maybe not. It could be a suppressed desire rearing its head in dream form. Too many movies watched and a done-to-death plot finding expression with real people!!

Or maybe my hunch is right. It could be a message from across a multitude of individual consciousness. Tying up two loose ends at a different level and letting it be known here.

13 comments:

  1. I believe in some sort of astral projecting and that sometimes dreams arent just of the sorting variety, but of another plane, a different level of being.

    I had a really lucid dream this morning as well. And it didn't just feel like a desire to have a child, but that I was actually with potentially, a future spawn.

    The colours were vibrant, the lighting bright, and in my lap was a baby girl, one that I claimed as my own, with a lighter dark complexion, a lighter mix of what Jassen and I might create someday. This girl looked at me and communicated not through words, but a deeply rooted understanding that needed not the complexities of words but was a knowing of the oldest variety.

    The strange thing was that she not only had sad tears in her eyes, but kinda like the consistency of jelly/jello, clear, it covered her face, like a wrapping/shield and I wiped it from her. She then became happy and smiling and I felt the need to take a picture.

    There was a camera next to me, and as I reached, knowing it to be a dream like state, the scene changed and I was unable to capture that moment with a camera...

    Maybe your dream was a mix of projection?dreaming?or maybe both?

    I am told from my parents that they have seen my astral body "walking" around the house at night..

    Maybe that's why I am so tired in the mornings..

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  2. Such a wonderful dream Jen! And it's nice to know that your parents are open to these ideas which are so 'new-agey' and hence easily dismissed--that they're able to see you astrally! Wow.

    I once saw my son in a dream, when Archana was in her eighth month of pregnancy--and that time we weren't aware if it would be a boy or a girl! I saw him as a two year old from a distance and the resemblance to what he looks like today was uncanny!

    There are quite a few in our friends' circle for whom the boundary between 'reality' and the other side is very thin--those who can perceive extra-sensory things so easily, in their wakeful states and not just while dreaming. This heightened sense of perception seems to be our birthright, something we've lost along the way. And something we all will recover in the journey ahead :-)

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  3. I have never had such lovely dreams. Probably not really in touch with the spiritual.

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  4. Correction ma'am -- 'Probably not really in touch with the psychic', which most of us are not, at first glance!

    As I understand, the ability to sense things outside our normal perception has nothing to do with the spiritual. These are psychic capabilities, either inborn or cultivated through practices. Of course, they'll be present in everyone but at varying degrees. Pay attention and you'll be amazed!

    To be spiritual means to be kind, loving, understanding, accomodating, open-minded.... living the qualities of the Spirit. And I guess, you are in touch with the spiritual :-)

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  5. "But this confirms something, settles something, reconciles something that was in waiting. Something unfinished seems to have found its logical end. Like keeping down a burden that had been on ones heart from ages." - somehow I also feel this dream is telling you something. Sometimes dreams speak in symbols. What does this girl stand for? And your family? Is it telling you to choose something? Quite interesting....wonder where it will lead you. What a wonderful experience!

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  6. Meena....I haven't paid much attention to the symbolic message of dreams because one can intrepret them in any which way. What's really interesting about dreams is the crazy possibility they present, which we never think of in the 'real world'.

    In one dream, I was flying like a bird, surfing on the waves of wind. One can intrepret this in any way but for me, the best thing was the feeling of defying gravity and the brush of air I experienced against my body, as I jumped without fear from building to building. That feeling was so real and something I wouldn't have even 'dreamt of' in reality.

    Thinking about dreams also opens up more philosophical questions, like, when you are dreaming, you are totally sure that it is real but only on waking up do you realize that it was an illusion. Is it the same with our so-called reality? Are we sure that this is real only as long as we are inside it, but once we 'wake up', do we realize the illusory part of our every day reality?

    Is there a waking up? If so, what is it? :-)

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  7. Dear vishwa,

    "Maybe not. It could be a suppressed desire rearing its head in dream form. Too many movies watched and a done-to-death plot finding expression with real people!!"

    i agree upon this.....no one should heed too much important to all these...instead pay more attention to beautiful Life around ...

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  8. Very poignant, Vishwa, and enlightening. I have been having some very realistic dreams this week. So realistic that when I awaken I feel than I am still in them.

    Strange. I wonder if some cosmic messenger is opening us to these dreams.

    Blessings, my friend.

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  9. There were these incidents in my life, where I could prompt as in a play the words and the action that was to take place... and would think, why a replay??

    dreams....

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  10. Vishwa, bumped on to your blog. I read through most of your posts, really inspiring and thought provoking. Man... you contemplate a lot.

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  12. Vishwa, dear friend, I wait expectantly for more delightful words from you.

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