Tuesday, March 21, 2006

Just like that

Archana has a different glow in her these days. She's the same girl I knew but still she's different, somehow.

You are disturbed when your mighty hero falls, isn't it? In movies, as in life, we're eternally hopeful. We'd like our hero to ride into sunset with the lady after destroying the villains and setting right all wrongs. When a hero falls, something in you falls too--a hope, a dream collapses. The hero represents your truimphs, he can do all that you only wished you could do, reach where you only hoped you'd reach. His downfall tramples a tiny flower somewhere in the garden of your heart.

Feel sad everytime Sachin tendulkar fails. His downcast face, slow march towards the pavillion somehow symbolises your own failure in life. Sachin should triumph but he's human too. When his stumps are shattered and he looks back bewildered, we are there-- in his bewilderment. In his victory, he makes our hearts flutter with pride. In his failure he comes close to us. He too is one amongst us, afterall.

Until recently, Dad had two old tape-recorders on which he played his favourite songs of yesteryears. Or sometimes, he'd just flip on the radio and listen to the non-stop songs played on radiocity. By any means, the music system played more noise than music, and after you put in a casette, it would start groaning after a minute or two. And the only person who never seemed to bother about it was dad--he'd continue to listen whatever came out of the stereo .

Last sunday, as we drove back home from the 'village', we purchased a modest new stereo, got a few of dad's favourite casettes(Manna de and gulzar),and presented it to him. After some hesitation, he accepted the gift, gathered the old systems, packed them and put them away in the attic and plugged in the new stereo.

Now the music that streams out of dad's room is without any jarring notes.

You can feel it but can't define it for sure. Time. And when it hurries past you in a tremendous hurry, at times you wonder about your own life, your goals, your values----all in relation to time. You know that life is all about change, one day is not like the previous one, you'll grow up, move ahead, have new experiences, acquire things, make friendships, lose people, lose peace, gain wisdom, worry, smile, hurry.....but is it all there is to life? Is what you see on the surface the only thing available to us? Is there a depth, a different dimension to life? And if there is, what stops you from discovering it and diving deep?

What will be the routine of a 67 year old person, who has lived a full life? Looking at my dad, i'd say--Just relax and chill out. Take good care of your health, read leisurely, listen to good music, watch loads of tv, go to libraries, laze off, visit relatives, play with grandchildren at home..... Why would anyone think about realising new dreams at that age? Who would think about having a vision and inspiring youngsters to dream similarly? And who would work tirelessly to achieve impossible dreams at an age when your faculties are slowly dimming and you need to slow down and spend the rest of your days peacefully?

When i look at one such person, my zest for life soars up and i feel, one hundred years is too short a time for one life. A few minutes spent with him and the most ardent cynic will come back with renewed love and affinity for life. It's a pity that i can't spend much time with him and have to return to my day to day life, confined to the smallness of my comfort zone. When the whole world prods you to add more to your life in terms of quantity, and you are pushed into the competition and mad rush of the materialistic world, there are a few individuals who inspire you to look within and find light. When life in general looks bleak and downcast there are only a few people who can raise your awareness to unknown heights and bring out the eternal youth hidden inside you.

I wish i could be with my master for much longer durations and learn to look at life with new eyes. I wish i could get in touch with the unknown, stretch myself and spread my wings towards new destinations.

Yeah, i will do that someday, but how I wish that day was today!

5 comments:

  1. The love—the need—for a parent, a teacher, a guru, is always with us in this life. Even when we our selves become the parent and the teacher, we still have that need.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Enjoyed your post tremenduously.Getting your dad a gift was such a nice gesture.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Nick...For me, a master is one who has walked the path and knows what is what. Learning directly from an enlightened person takes you faster on the path than if you venture out alone. Some may say that they don't need a Master--they are self-taught, etc, but i don't think that's true. Even a self-taught person learns something from a book, or from life, or from observing others, and then Life itself becomes a master for him.

    Edu...:-)

    ReplyDelete
  4. U Reaaly have a nice way of knitting all that together ....

    it is so personal .......
    yet so discreet .......
    filled with so much love i flet for all those around u

    give my reagrds to all at home ..i mean all in the post

    BL

    ReplyDelete
  5. Bubbling...Thanks.
    Your style reminds me of another friend who now blogs occasionally.

    ReplyDelete