Sunday, June 15, 2014

Who are my People...

 This temporariness of human interactions ...and how deep certain bondings go and how shallow most of them remain....that's been playing on my mind for a while. I'm sitting in a small hall, listening to some presentations---and I turn to my left and there's a girl. She too turns towards me...our eyes meet for a nano second. And we look back at the stage. While I walk out of that hall, I think of this girl and the first thought is...'I'll never see or interact with her again.' I pull my bike out of the parking lot, and there's another girl struggling with a heavy bullet bike and her boyfriend(?) behind her is encouraging her, pushing it. They're in my field of awareness for roughly ten seconds before I start my bike and rush through the drizzly night towards my home. Another interaction...fleeting out of my life.

I bump against at least a few hundred people everyday on my way to office and back. Almost all of them are 2 second interactions...except maybe the policeman at the traffic junctures, the same vendors who rush in to sell their wares, the security guard who opens the gate at my office. How high is the probability that I'll get to meet at least one of these people(from the 2 second interaction group), again in my life? Dunno....almost null I guess. If I go to office at exactly the same time, in the same route, and try to register each and every face that I come across..maybe I'll see similar faces after a while. And assuming they too are in a similar thought process of establishing friendships, maybe I'll greet them, they smile back, we strike up a conversation etc. Hasn't happened even once all these years, so its as if I'm blindly rushing through a sea of humanity whom I briefly touch against every day....yet, like a lotus leaf that doesn't get wet by the surrounding water, I emerge dry and clean...and return back to my familiar atmosphere...of familiar faces.

There's an auto-rickshaw driver who, out of his own will, got out of his vehicle and pushed my car a short distance when the battery went dead, so that I could jump start it. Turned and shouted a thanks with a smile and....gone...haven't seen him again, though he cut through and removed a huge misery from my life that night. There's another guy...again an auto-rickshaw fellow who drove me and my parents home one late night from the railway station and stopped in the middle of nowhere and briefly vanished...God knows with what intention...and my parents sensing danger flagged down another auto and we were safe home. Two who saved and the other who would've destroyed...two very important people. How many such interactions have I had? Hundreds...if I start remembering and counting. Maybe...they were meant to arrive at those intense points, turn fate's lever with a great might, and then vanish into thin air...never to cross my life again. Just thinking how important a role they played and how things could've altered slightly or sends me into a state of awe!

Friends change too and vanish, reappear etc. I have had very deep friendships and bondings...starting right from my childhood. Only one guy has stood the test of time and I get to meet and talk to him, very occasionally. Some have connected back through facebook. Maybe I've brushed against a few thousand people...important and otherwise since the day I was born until now....and those I truly know and still interact with...they are rare. Relations change, people flit out of your life, new ones arrive....yet some bondings endure and remain. Some remain suspended for a long period ...and suddenly get ignited and spring back to life, as if by magic. Only those who're bonded by blood--your relatives---they remain a constant in this ever changing medley of human interactions and bondings. And a few friendships go deep with or without any effort, and before you know, you have formed your circle of friends who vibrate with your frequency.  And this possibility of forging deep bonds with a select appears to be a mystical process, beyond any human interference or effort. It looks like you've taken the time and care to nurture such relations, or maybe the other people have contributed too...but NO...I sense, its beyond you. You were meant to go deep with them and they with you. Period.

There's a lovely song where a small boy who arrives to a new city wonders... 'So many houses, and where is mine? So many people here, and who are my people?' His bewilderment is mine too at times. In this sea of humanity, a few waves splash at me and I get drenched with a few drops, although I swim constantly in these waters. Maybe its meant to be that way.